Sunday, April 1, 2012

Graveyard Dirt

When my father passed away, my mother wanted to go back to Long Island NY to visit her mother’s grave site. It was her wish to gather some of the dirt from her resting place and have it buried with her when she passed as well. We had always talked about it, but my mother had become fearful of driving, and of long drives. It was hard to get her to go out as the years went on. When we did go out, she could barely get around. When she passed away in January of this year, I decided that I would take the long trip to Long Island and get the graveyard dirt she so wanted. The drive took 3 hours, and it was a lovely ride. I could see why she loved it so much, and I realize now how very much she missed it. I took my boys with me, and they enjoyed the ride as much as I did! 

So, when I went to the graveyard where my grandmother, my mother’s mother lay, there was no intent other than to fulfill my mother’s wish. As I began my research for this topic, I did not realize that if I wanted to use this for spells and such that I needed to ask the spirit for permission and leave gifts after I was finished. When I was there, I noticed that the other gravesites were decorated with wreaths. My grandmother’s was not. I was saddened by this. As I knelt at her headstone, I brushed the dead leaves away and just looked at it. I listened to the wind blowing through the trees. I felt as if it was all right for me to be there. I told my grandmother that I was there because of mom’s wish. I didn’t feel anything malevolent or oppressive; I just felt a sense of peace. I then took the small paper bag out of my jacket pocket and took a couple of handfuls. I had read somewhere that it was best when collecting anything, whether it is specifically for spell work or just to have, always use paper, glass, or natural fibers. Anyway, after I completed this task that I set for myself, I sat back and just took in the peacefulness of the graveyard. We then began the long drive back to home. After we got home, I placed the bag on my stove so that the dirt would dry overnight. When it was dry, I took some of it and put it into an empty glass spice jar, unfortunately it had a plastic lid, but the spice jar symbolizes the love of cooking and creativity that my mother and I shared. Added to the soil was a leaf from the last flowers I got her while she was in the hospital. I always bought her a rose on my birthday thanking her for my safe delivery and raising me. I also included a note on the card from the flowers and sealed the jar. It will be included when my mother is finally laid to rest next to my father. My next goal is to find the grave sites of my two sisters who passed before me as babies, as well as my great-grandmother. I think that my mother would be happy having her family close to her.

My grandmother Dolumba.

On the ride home, I stopped to view the Bayside Marina. I wondered if my mother ever went there.

Another view of the Marina. Beautiful.

The seagulls were very obliging.

So, graveyard dirt can be used in spells, either malevolent or for benevolent uses. It can be used for very powerful protection spells. Some like to gather the dirt from the head, heart and feet of the grave site. Some like to gather the dirt deeper from the surface. For protection spells, it is said that the best is from your ancestors, from those who loved you in life, and love you still even after they have passed. For the darker spells it is said that one must gather the dirt from those that did harm in life. Personally, I would not want to do that. Everyone’s path is different, and one must choose what is right for them. If I wanted to use the dirt in spells at all, I would use my ancestors. They protected and loved us in life, so it stands to reason that they would aid us even in the beyond. What do you think?

Saturday, March 31, 2012


My interpretation of a familiar is an animal that has a connection with its human, psychic or otherwise.  I have two pugs and one VERY old (16 years old on April 1). My two boys, whom I have briefly spoken of in previous posts, are very sensitive. As I said in previous posts, they seem to sense a presence in the apartment in which we now reside. At times, they seem comfortable, stretching out wherever they want. At other times, they are right next to me, Duke at my feet, and Joker attempting to crawl in my lap. Or, when it is time for bed, Joker will sleep right up against me facing the doorway, while my Duke will either sleep on the floor next to the bed, or right in front of the doorway. My Furball kitty seems to be the guardian kitty, wandering from room to room, checking out the little nooks and corners of our little domicile. 

In the past, it was said that the use of Familiars was used for evil, for aid in carrying spells against others. Familiars could be anything from animals, reptiles and insects. We know the truth, and that is that our animal friends are beneficial to us in many ways. They sense and can warn us of danger as we go about our daily lives and during our rituals. As I sit here typing this, my boys are peacefully sleeping at my feet. There seems to be nothing to fear on this night.

Joker, My cuddly guardian!

Duke, my other guardian camped out by the bedroom door!

Furball Kitty, take a few years ago at the other house.

Monday, March 19, 2012


I had read an article somewhere that Frankincense was good for cleansing negative energies among other things, so I bought some cone incense and started burning it before going to bed at night. I have finally gotten a decent night’s sleep for the past week or two without waking up in the middle of the night. So I began to research further on this wonderful herb. 

First off, Frankincense is a resin, which is harvested from the Boswellia tree by cutting horizontally into the bark, thus allowing the resin to “bleed” to the surface then allowed to harden before harvesting, which usually takes about two weeks. The trees will only grow in the most inhospitable of environments, even growing out of the cracks of rocks. 

Scientists are now discovering that there are benefits to utilizing Frankincense. It seems that breathing the aroma of the incense helps reduce anxiety and depression, and they are studying the benefits of using it as a cure for cancer.

As I stated before, I have been using it to aid in my sleeping, but, it is also useful in eliminating negativity and can be used for protection or consecrations. 

I was disturbed over the fact that the trees must be cut into in order to gather the resin. Because there seems to be quite a demand of it, the trees are beginning to suffer. The trees are slow growing, thus, the trees are dying out faster than they can be replaced by the new. I will just have to go to my other favorite scent, Lavender.

Sunday, March 11, 2012


I am intentionally late for this particular post, with good reason. I had been planning a day trip to Hampton Beach in New Hampshire all week, as I had been keeping an eye on the weather reports. It was supposed to be a fantastic day today, with temperatures in the 50’s, and it was gorgeous! The reason for the trip was threefold. 1: I have been extremely unsettled for several weeks now, and just walking with the boys on the mountain wasn’t cutting it for me. 2: I needed to gather materials that I could only get from the beach. 3: I have always felt better when I reconnected with the ocean.

I know that several others have written about the Elements, (and beautifully written, I might add.) but, this is my interpretation of the Elements.

I needed to connect with ALL of the Elements: Air, Earth, Fire and Water. At the beach, I can do all of that. I feel the wind blowing, the sand beneath my bare feet, the warmth of the Sun, and the rushing waves crashing against me. All of the Elements are working together harmoniously. 

Today, I gathered only what I needed. I stood in front of the ocean, just breathing and feeling. I really had no conscious thoughts; I just tried to clear my mind. Then I turned around and set my backpack down, and took off my shoes and socks, rolled up my pant legs. I then took out a canning jar and removed the lid and began to wade out into the ocean. I stood for a few moments and waited.  A seagull flew over me. I felt that I was receiving permission to gather some of the sea water, which I did. I walked back to my pack, sealed the jar and placed it in my pack. I then sat down on the sand and just absorbed the sights and sounds. People were walking their dogs, riding their horses, or just holding each other. It was very peaceful. I then took out another jar, and gathered some beach sand. I need that to line my cauldron so I can safely utilize it when I perform rituals that involve fire. I then got up, still bare foot, and started to walk down the beach. I felt a real connection then, and every once in a while, I would find a stone or a shell that would call to me and I would gather those too. But, what I was really looking for was a seagull feather, for that to me symbolizes Air, and it would be the final Element that I was looking for. As I was walking along, I said to myself out loud “What would make this perfect is if I could find a feather from a seagull, if it is allowed.” About five minutes later, I found two small feathers, one white, the other a gray one. The gray feather was over a small stone, also gray in color which I picked up as well. I will be using these items to finally complete my altar, which is residing in my bedroom. 

I am feeling much better now that I have made the trip, and I will be making it a little more often now.





Friday, March 2, 2012


I have always been a loner, even as a child. I was the oldest of three children growing up in what I considered the middle of nowhere. We had a small farm where we raised our own cows, pigs, chickens, geese and turkeys. We had a garden, which consisted of the normal veggies, herbs, and flowers. We also had dogs and cats, lots of cats. I had a cow; a Jersey named Penny, who was a descendant of Elsie the Cow. I was always walking her in the woods, I would observe the ever-changing face of nature during our walks, and she would nibble on the sparse grass along the way. Our destination invariably would be what I called the Three Ponds, so named by me because there was one large pond and two smaller ones after the large one. It would be at the large pond where Penny would wade in up to her belly to drink deeply of the clear water, while I sat under the birches that hung over the pond and just try to clear my mind. I always enjoyed those walks, because I needed the peace and quiet of the woods, to hear the rustle of the wind through the trees, especially the pines, and always, always needed to go to the ponds. You see, mine was a very odd childhood. It seemed as though I was always the one that had to take care of my sister and brother, and as I grew older I became the “mediator”, if you will, between my mom and dad. Mind you, I only listened to them complain about each other to me. They would never try to talk to each other. Then there was the nightmare of going to school. I was a shy child so I found it very hard to make friends. I was targeted by some of the other children as being different. I wasn’t different, I was just more sensitive than most. 

As I grew older, I tried very hard to shut out people in general. I hated (and still hate) to go shopping. I have literally left my cart in the check out because I couldn’t handle the stress of waiting in line. I am still trying to figure out how I managed to work for a major retailer for 14 months. I guess it was the fact that I truly enjoyed helping my customers, and I loved my co-workers. It was just toward the end when my old supervisor left and the new one just didn’t seem to fit. Coupled with the fact that there were changes being made in the way we had to stock our shelves put me over the edge. I just couldn’t handle how the customers were looking at me. They were upset because we couldn’t keep the stock up. I could sense their feelings even though they wouldn’t voice them. I could always sense how my co-workers were feeling as well, and I would listen to them as they complained to me about work or something going on in their lives. 

I was wondering one day why I felt the way I did. Why I need to walk every day, morning and night with my boys (my puggies :) ). Sometimes I would drive up to the little mountain close to my house and walk with them for an hour just to decompress after work. Why I need to go to the ocean now more than ever. I have always been drawn to the ocean, but I have always lived near a water feature, be it a brook that ran through our front yard when I was a child, the ponds I walked to with my cow, the river I live next to now. Why do I cry at certain times, like at the end of Criminal Minds last night? And a host of other things as well.

As I started to research the subject of empaths, I realized that a lot of what I was reading described what I was going through, what I was feeling, what I needed to decompress. While I do not have ALL the traits, I do have most of them. For instance, I studied for a Computer Forensics certificate in 2010. A couple of the classes had rather graphic text books. I studied them as part of the curriculum, but they really didn’t bother me. I was detached. However, when I was a firefighter in my town, I responded to a car accident with fatalities. I did my job as I was supposed to, but I was almost catatonic afterwards. Soon after that, I resigned. I could not be detached. I would always feel that pain. But, watching a movie with violence really doesn’t bother me, as does reading a true crime novel, or a horror novel. As for creativity, I love crocheting, writing, and a few other things. 

I still don’t feel comfortable labeling myself as an “empath”, maybe a “highly sensitive person”. I am not qualified to label myself as anything. I just know that I have been and have felt, this way all my life. I have tried to shut most of it out, unsuccessfully. I live alone now with my boys and my kitty, and I do like it that way. Oh, I am a little lonely at times, but right now, I really don’t want anyone in my space. I have more than enough company.  :)